If you are the one who broke the trust, most of what exists on this subject describes you rather than speaks to you. These articles are written to you — about getting your own help, doing the work underneath the behavior, and understanding what repair actually asks of you. Not absolution, and not a place to be told it wasn’t that bad. Somewhere to start.
Why “he is here now” fails as reassurance after betrayal Telling a betrayed partner that her spouse is present now does not settle intrusive thinking, because he was present during the betrayal as well. The objection is logically correct, which is why any reassurance built on presence alone collapses. Presence during concealment cost him nothing … Read more
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